strix
ALL_GLORY_TO_THE_NEUTRAL_PLANET:¤cars¤and¤rockets¤taking¤to¤the¤skies.]¤Fry:¤My¤God!!¤It's¤the¤future!¤My¤parents,¤my¤co-workers,¤m
y¤girlfriend.¤I'll¤never¤see¤any¤of¤them¤again.¤Yahoo!¤[Opening¤Credits.¤Caption:¤In¤Color.]¤[Scene:¤Cryogenics¤Lab.¤Fry¤is¤still¤l
ooking¤out¤of¤the¤window.¤Enter¤a¤lab¤technician¤called¤Terry¤and¤another¤technician.]¤Terry¤(dramatic¤voice):¤Welcome¤to¤the¤world
¤of¤tomorrow!!¤[The¤other¤technician¤turns¤the¤light¤on.]¤Lab¤Technician:¤Why¤do¤you¤always¤have¤to¤say¤it¤that¤way?¤Terry:¤Haven't
¤you¤ever¤heard¤of¤a¤little¤thing¤called¤showmanship?¤[To¤Fry.]¤Come¤your¤destiny¤awaits!!¤[Scene:¤Corridor.¤The¤technicians¤leave¤
Fry¤outside¤the¤Fate¤Assignment¤Officer's¤office.]¤Lab¤Technician:¤Have¤a¤nice¤future.¤[The¤door¤slides¤open.]¤Fry:¤Cool¤just¤like¤
in¤Star¤Tre¤-[The¤door¤closes¤on¤him.]¤Ow!¤[Cut¤to:¤Fate¤Assignment¤Officer's¤office.¤A¤woman¤with¤a¤purple¤ponytail¤holds¤a¤clipbo
ard¤and¤looks¤out¤a¤window.]¤Woman:¤Good¤afternoon¤sir!¤Fry:¤Mmm!¤[The¤woman¤turns¤around¤-¤she¤is¤a¤cyclops]¤Eurgh!¤Woman:¤Name?¤F
ry:¤Uh...Fry.¤Woman:¤I'm¤Leela.¤Now¤it's¤New¤Years¤Eve¤so¤I'd¤like¤to¤decide¤your¤fate¤quickly¤and¤get¤out¤of¤here!¤Fry:¤Can¤I¤ask¤
you¤a¤question?¤Leela:¤As¤long¤as¤its¤not¤about¤my¤eye.¤Fry:¤Um.¤Leela:¤Is¤it¤about¤my¤eye?¤Fry:¤Sort¤of.¤[Leela¤sighs.]¤Leela:¤Jus
t¤ask¤the¤question.¤Fry:¤Whats¤with¤the¤eye?¤Leela:¤I'm¤an¤alien¤alright?¤Now¤lets¤drop¤the¤subject.¤Fry:¤Cool,¤an¤alien!¤Has¤your¤
race¤taken¤over¤the¤Earth?¤Leela:¤No¤I¤just¤work¤here.¤[Fry¤looks¤out¤the¤window.¤A¤passing¤blimp¤shows¤the¤message¤"Happy¤New¤Year
¤3000"]¤Fry:¤Wait¤a¤minute,¤is¤that¤blimp¤accurate?¤Leela:¤Yep!¤It's¤December¤31st¤2999.¤Fry:¤My¤God!¤A¤million¤years!¤Leela:¤I'm¤s
ure¤this¤must¤be¤very¤upsetting¤for¤you.¤Fry:¤You¤know,¤I¤guess¤it¤should¤be¤but¤actually¤I'm¤glad.¤I¤had¤nothing¤to¤live¤for¤in¤my
¤old¤life.¤I¤was¤broke.¤I¤had¤a¤humiliating¤job¤and¤I¤was¤beginning¤to¤suspect¤my¤girlfriend¤might¤be¤cheating¤on¤me.¤Leela:¤Well¤a
t¤least¤here¤you'll¤be¤treated¤with¤dignity.¤Now¤strip¤naked¤and¤get¤on¤the¤Probe-u-Lator!¤[Scene:¤Probe-u-Lator¤Room.¤Fry¤is¤lying
¤on¤a¤metal¤table¤surrounded¤by¤lots¤of¤things¤designed¤to,¤well,¤probe¤him!¤Leela¤presses¤a¤button.]¤Fry:¤Ooo!¤[Time¤Lapse.¤Leela¤
tears¤off¤a¤printout.]¤Leela:¤Interesting.¤Your¤DNA¤test¤shows¤one¤living¤relative.¤He's¤your¤great¤great¤great¤great¤great¤great¤g
reat..[Time¤Lapse.¤Fry¤is¤now¤fully¤dressed]..great¤great¤great¤great¤great¤nephew.¤Fry:¤That's¤great!¤What's¤the¤little¤guy's¤name
?¤Leela:¤Professor¤Hubert¤Farnsworth.¤[She¤turns¤the¤page¤over¤to¤show¤Fry¤the¤photo.¤Farnsworth¤is¤a¤decrepid¤old¤man.]¤Fry:¤Eurgh
!¤[Scene:¤Fate¤Assignment¤Officer's¤office.¤Leela¤is¤typing¤on¤a¤computer.]¤Fry:¤You¤know!¤I'm¤the¤luckiest¤guy¤in¤the¤whole¤future
!¤I've¤been¤given¤a¤second¤chance¤and¤this¤time,¤I'm¤not¤going¤to¤be¤a¤total¤loser.¤[A¤buzzer¤buzzes.]¤What's¤that?¤Leela:¤Your¤per
manent¤career¤assignment.¤[She¤turns¤the¤screen¤around.¤"Career:¤Delivery¤Boy"]¤Fry:¤Delivery¤boy??¤No!¤Not¤again!¤Please!¤Anything
¤else!¤[He¤grabs¤Leela's¤hand.]¤Leela:¤Take¤your¤hands¤off¤me!¤You've¤been¤assigned¤the¤job¤you're¤best¤at¤just¤like¤everyone¤else.
¤Fry:¤What¤if¤I¤refuse?¤Leela:¤Then¤you'll¤be¤fired...¤Fry:¤Fine!¤Leela:¤...out¤of¤a¤cannon¤into¤the¤Sun!¤Fry:¤But¤I¤don't¤like¤bei
ng¤a¤delivery¤boy.¤Leela:¤Well¤that's¤tough!¤Lot's¤of¤people¤don't¤like¤their¤jobs¤but¤we¤do¤them¤anyway.¤[She¤points¤at¤a¤poster¤o
f¤a¤builder¤with¤a¤message¤saying¤"You¤Gotta¤Do¤What¤You¤Gotta¤Do."]¤You¤gotta¤do¤what¤you¤gotta¤do!¤Now¤hold¤out¤your¤hand,¤I'm¤go
ing¤to¤implant¤your¤career¤chip.¤It'll¤permanently¤label¤you¤as¤a¤delivery¤boy.¤[She¤holds¤out¤an¤implant¤gun.]¤Fry:¤Keep¤that¤thin
g¤away¤from¤me!!¤[He¤runs¤out¤of¤the¤office¤and¤down¤the¤corridor]¤[Cut¤to:¤Cryogenics¤Lab.¤Fry¤dodges¤Leela's¤gun.]¤Leela:¤Hold¤st
ill¤dammit!¤I¤don't¤have¤good¤depth¤perception!¤[She¤jumps¤at¤Fry,¤misses,¤and¤falls¤into¤a¤cryonic¤chamber.¤It¤sets¤for¤1000¤years
.]¤You've¤got¤until¤the¤count¤of¤5¤to¤let¤me¤out¤of¤here.¤1.¤[She¤is¤frozen.]¤Fry:¤See¤you¤in¤1000¤years!¤[He¤starts¤to¤walk¤out¤bu
t¤has¤a¤change¤of¤heart.¤He¤walks¤back¤to¤the¤chamber¤at¤changes¤the¤freeze¤time¤to¤5¤minutes.]¤You¤owe¤me¤one!¤[Scene:¤Street.¤Fry
¤is¤again¤amazed¤at¤what¤he¤sees¤around¤him.]¤Fry:¤Whoa!!¤[He¤sees¤the¤tube¤transport¤system¤and¤gives¤it¤a¤try.]¤Man:¤Radio¤City¤M
utant¤Hall!¤[The¤man¤is¤sucked¤up¤into¤the¤tube]¤Fry:¤Um.¤Cross¤Town¤Express?¤[He¤is¤sucked¤up¤into¤the¤tube]¤Whaaaaa!¤[People¤look
¤up¤from¤the¤street¤and¤stare¤at¤him.¤He¤is¤taken¤across¤the¤city,¤past¤the¤Statue¤of¤Liberty,¤underwater¤and¤finally¤out¤the¤other
¤end¤smack¤into¤a¤building.]¤Man:¤Pfft!¤Tourist!¤[Scene:¤Street.¤Fry¤sees¤something.]¤Fry:¤Hey¤a¤phone¤booth,¤I¤can¤call¤my¤nephew.
¤[An¤impatient¤robot¤joins¤the¤queue¤behind¤him.]¤Wow¤a¤real¤live¤robot!¤Or¤is¤that¤some¤kind¤of¤cheesy¤New¤Years¤costume?¤Robot:¤B
ite¤my¤shiny¤metal¤ass!¤Fry:¤It¤doesn't¤look¤so¤shiny¤to¤me.¤Robot:¤It's¤shinier¤than¤yours¤meatbag!¤[Cut¤to:¤Suicide¤Booth.¤Fry¤st
ill¤doesn't¤know¤it¤isn't¤a¤phone¤booth.¤He¤presses¤a¤button.¤Nothing¤happens.]¤Robot:¤Listen¤buddy,¤I'm¤in¤a¤hurry¤here,¤lets¤try¤
for¤a¤twofer!¤[He¤puts¤a¤coin¤on¤a¤string¤in¤the¤slot¤then¤pulls¤it¤out¤again.]¤Hehe!¤Woman's¤voice:¤Please¤select¤mode¤of¤death.¤Q
uick¤and¤painless¤or¤slow¤and¤horrible.¤Fry:¤Yeah,¤I'd¤like¤to¤place¤a¤collect¤call.¤Woman's¤voice:¤You¤have¤selected:¤Slow¤and¤hor